Yuki Kouki. I only remember her name because in my mind I thought it rhymed. If you say it in Japanese I'm not sure it actually would rhyme, but that's how I've always remembered it. Yuki was my pen pal in the 5th grade. It was one of those class projects the teacher asked if we'd be interested in. Even as a young girl I enjoyed writing. Letters, notes, it didn't matter. I just liked to write. So what could be more fun than having a pen pal? I remember the day we had to choose which country our pen pal would be from. We only had a few choices and I picked Japan because I liked rice. Seems like a perfectly good reason to an eleven year old right? It makes me smile now at the depths (or lack of depths) I went to in choosing my country.
I wish I could say that Yuki and I forged a lifelong friendship filled with letters of our childhood antics, our first dates, our graduations, loves, heartbreaks, and so on. But we didn't. Yuki and I wrote a handful of letters to each other for about a year. Her life was starkly different from mine in some ways. She was an only child living in a city north of Tokyo I think. I wish I could remember the name. She lived with her parents, grandparents (and maybe an uncle?) in an apartment. I remember her mom was a nurse. Meanwhile, across the globe, I had two younger brothers, lived in an old two story victorian, in small town, middle America. We had a big backyard and a neighborhood full of kids. I remember thinking how fun it would be to live with my grandparents...and in an apartment?! Wow...as a kid there was nothing more exciting than that! Her life seemed almost glamorous to me. Looking back I wonder how she felt about mine? Did she ever think about playing in a big back yard with lots of grass, just like I thought about the busy city and the elevator she took every day up to her apartment?
Even though Yuki and I lived worlds apart we also had some 'eleven year old girl similarities'. We enjoyed school, and playing piano. We both hated cats. (sorry cat lovers) We were both in love...and I mean real, true LOVE with teen heart throb Shawn Cassidy and even had the same poster hanging in our bedrooms. I can't tell you how much I wish I could find her letters. She wrote a poem once about our shared love for Shawn and I remember thinking she was nothing short of brilliant!
I loved Twinkies, and she loved these cake things...or pies, I'm not sure, but they were called Choco Shrooms, or Choco Pies. (I had to google to remember) The other day when the earthquake hit and the devastation began it was one of the first things I thought of. Yuki, and those pies she loved so much. I know how odd it may seem seem to think of something so trivial in the face of such tragedy. But then I realized how easy it is to look at the news and see what's going on over there but not feel a real connection to it. Sure, the footage is horrific. We see the images and hear the heartbreaking stories. It causes all of us, or at least it should, to pause and reflect on our own lives. To be thankful for all the blessings we have in every moment.
I wish I could say I thought about Japan and her people often before this tragedy... but I didn't. I wish I could say I was moved to pray for them before this tragedy...but I wasn't. I didn't even really think of Yuki very much until this all happened. But when it did happen, there she was. Yuki, and her love of Choco Pies. Yuki and her jet black hair and brown eyes. So opposite of my blond, blue eyed self. I thought of Yuki in her apartment, where I'm sure she ate rice with her grandparents.
I wish I knew what became of her, my pen pal friend. I wonder if she still lives in Japan. And if so, was she was hurt, or even worse? I'm sure she hasn't given her American pen pal , a single thought in the wake of all that's happened. But if I could, I would tell her that someone across the world remembers her. I'd tell her how sorry I am, and how much I wish I could help her in some way. I'd cry with her over what's happening to her beautiful country. I'd remind her what a great poet she was at age eleven and ask if she still likes to write. I'd ask her if I could say a prayer for her that God would comfort her and give her strength.
I understand now why thinking of Yuki and her love of pies was not trivial. It wasn't trivial because Japan is not just some country...some abstract place.... with abstract people....it's full of Yuki's who live in apartments and homes, who are nurses, and ride in elevators, and love Shawn Cassidy. (I guess now it would be Justin Bieber) It's a place where families celebrate birthdays, go on vacations, sing songs in the shower and eat rice and Choco Pies. And maybe even Twinkies. It's a place that I will keep praying for in the weeks and months ahead. And Yuki, if you are there, I hope you are well and safe. As well and safe as can be expected I guess. And I'd like to say thank you for giving me a face for Japan, so I can continue to remember you and your country with compassion, and even hope for the future.
With Love...Your pen pal,
Jennifer
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